How to Snapchat

In a recent report released by Snapchat CEO Evan Spiegel, we learned that 70% of the app’s users are women.

Am I surprised? No.

I’m more surprised when I’m in class and I DON’T see a girl in front of me duck-facing the camera. In a study conducted on my own, I’ve found that I don’t give a shit about 80% of Snapchats I receive from women and men.

Snapchat is an app meant for sharing goofy pictures and videos you never want to see again with your closest friends. That’s why they can only last up to 10 seconds and you get notified every time someone decides to save that double-chin photo you sent. What it seems to have turned into is a trailer for your upcoming Instagram photos. I can’t count how many Snapchats I’ve gotten that are of some girl in one of my classes smiling in the car with the same captions: “Going to work lol”, “Hate school lol”, or my personal favorite, “Working out LOL”. I cannot reiterate enough how much I hate getting pictures like that. I could have gone my whole life without knowing or caring that you’re in the car on your way to do god-knows-what. The only thing that’s worse is when I get videos of girls singing in the car. Honey, I’m not Simon Cowell. Singing to me will not make you famous.

Men are not innocent of terrible snapping

Don’t assume men can’t make asses of themselves via Snapchat as well. They just have a different approach.

Here’s what guys usually send me: shirtless selfie, in bed, “bored”. You’re bored? So am I. The only reason you should ever send me a shirtless selfie as a male is…well never. But I would hate it less if you had the body of David Beckham or Channing Tatum. Other than that, dude, your neck and top of your chest does not turn me on one bit. If I receive a snap of you laying shirtless in bed, know that I will make this face when I touch the screen: Image

Please, please, PLEASE stop it.

Snapchat is a social app, yes. You use it just as often, if not more in my case, as any other social media app. However, it’s not meant for your modeling head shots or as visual statuses about your day. If I get a snap, I want to laugh at the crazy drawing you put on your professor, chuckle at a video you took of some crazy hobo, or see something awesome that you did. Snapchat is not a medium for the mundane, pointless tasks throughout your day. Use it for fun. Tell me what you’re doing if I ask; if you can’t wait until then, post it on a social networking site.

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